Back in the day, if you didn’t like something on your school lunch tray, you had two choices: pick it out or power through. But times have changed, and food issues can now take center stage. Here’s one recent example from a reader that serves up a hearty helping of “You can’t make it up!”
The Call Nobody Likes
The secretary stepped into the principal’s office with that look. “There’s a parent on the phone, and HE IS LIT UP!” If you’ve worked in a school, you know that line is never good news.
The principal picked up the phone, switched on his “pleasant and professional” voice, and asked how he could help.
“I just found out there were shredded carrots in the salad my kid had today!”
Apparently, a few stray carrot shreds had pushed this parent over the edge. To most of us, they’re harmless little veggies, but to him, they were an unacceptable threat to his child’s school lunch. Thrown by the request, the principal shifted into problem-solving mode.
“Yes, there may be some shredded carrots in the salad. How can I help?”
The response? A full-on demand to ban carrot shreds from the lunch menu. Why? No allergies, no dietary restrictions—just an ironclad dislike. The parent insisted that if he was paying for lunch, his child should enjoy it carrot-free.
Dealing with Unreasonable Demands…Reasonably
Sometimes, resolving a complaint is easy, and mutual agreement is a few quick steps away. But when a demand strays into the realm of unreasonable, it may be time to politely decline. Here are a few strategies for when “No” is the only possible answer.
Key Takeaways
1. Stay Calm and Patient
Unreasonable demands often come with high emotion. Remaining calm and patient helps you maintain control over the conversation. Empathize without committing, showing you understand their concern—even if you can’t meet it.
2. Listen First, Then Respond
Jumping straight to “No” can escalate things. Give the person time to express their issue fully, so they feel heard. Sometimes, just listening can take the edge off their frustration.
3. Politely Set Boundaries
When it’s time to say no, be polite but clear. Use phrases like, “I understand your concern, but…” or “Here’s what we’re able to do.” This shows you’re firm but considerate.
4. Redirect to a Realistic Solution
If their demand can’t be met, offer an alternative that’s actually possible. “I can’t ban carrots, but we can offer your child an alternative on salad days.” This can defuse tension and move the focus from what you can’t do to what you can.
5. Know When to Walk Away
Not every complaint needs to lead to a solution. Some requests are simply impractical or don’t align with the bigger goals of your organization. If you’ve tried all other avenues, it’s okay to stick to your decision.
In the end, you can’t please everyone all of the time—nor should you try! Knowing how to handle the occasional unreasonable demand is just another skill in the toolkit. Remember: sometimes, a polite “no” is the best answer of all.
Jane